Das tut mir leid

For those of you who don't keep up with The Colbert Report (read: unAmericans) Stephen sometimes pulls out what he calls the "On Notice" board. Being put On Notice signifies the official rebuke of Stephen and the Colbert Nation. Pictured left is the dry-erase version available at Comedy Central's website.

As most of you know, I'm generally a carefree, fun-loving individual. With that said, I'm putting a few things On Notice:

1. The German language
2. Cold
3. My bank account
4. Whoever invented the German language
5. Germans (presumably invented German language)
6. Windchill
7. Miami University (I saw a girl writhing on the ground with a broken leg yesterday, from slipping on the snowy sidewalk)
8. John Mayer improvising live

EDIT:
9. Ohio is also On Notice until it decides to be warm